INFIDELITY FOR BEGINNERS
Published: on Kindle October 2011; in print by Byker Books 2013
Plot outline: Static caravan magazine Editor, Andrew Nolan, is going nowhere fast and he knows it. Other people in far off places might fight in wars, rescue toddlers from burning buildings or make exciting breakthroughts in cancer research but not Andrew. He just writes about caravans. And static ones at that.
To escape the drudger of his working week Andrew loses himself in his daydreams. He daydreams about zombie armageddon, deep-sea aliens and the sexual intrigues of his friends and colleagues.
However, one such daydream begins to take on a very real shape when he notices his young, attractive and vibrant secretary, Elenor, making eyes at him from across the partition. Or is she? Is it all in his imagination or is Elenor just teasing him to relieve her own monotony? It's difficult to tell, especially for someone with Andrew's limited experience.
Married to his university sweetheart for over eight years Andrew can count the number of women he's known on one hand – and still have a couple of fingers left over to scratch his disappointment with. He had his chances in the dim and distant past but he missed them all. Does he dare miss this one as well? If indeed, there even is a chance to be missed. If only Elenor would give him a clearer sign.
Static caravan Editor Andrew Nolan yearns for a little excitement to shake up his life. He's about to get his wish. It'll be the last thing he expected and the worst experience of his life.
But it'll finally put his fantasies to bed once and for all.
Publisher: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
White Collar: I wrote the first chapter of this book in 2004 and the last chapter in 2011. Several drafts have come and gone in-between and I've been tinkering and rewriting parts of it on and off for the last few years before figuring it was time to get off the pot.
I'd originally called this book White Collar and indeed I'd actually written it before Blue Collar, but Serpent's Tail declined to publish it after disappointing sales figures for Blue Collar. I'm not sure how it was meant to sell when it wasn't actually stocked in the shops but this is a perenial author complaint. So I figured I'd put a page break between the two books and call it something different and actually I think Infidelity for Beginners is probably a better title anyway. It's certainly more apt.
Crossovers: There are no ties with Blue Collar, but there is a close connection with The Pornographer Diaries. Godfrey (main character from Pornographer) is also one of the main characters of this book and he speaks of Andrew, Elenor and Caravan Enthusiast in the first couple of chapters of The Pornographer Diaries, so the seeds of this book were laid down a long time ago. Infidelity is set shortly before Godfrey joins Bling and the porn industry.
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